Thank you Gamersgate for sending this game to us to review!

I've been playing games for a very, very long time. The first video game console my family owned was the Atari 5200, and one of my favorite games on it was a space simulator called “Star Raider.” The joystick for the system consisted of an actual joystick, two trigger buttons on either side, and a numeric keypad, and “Star Raider” used all those buttons. It was a game with somewhat complicated controls for the time, but it worked well. The action could be handled with the joystick and the fire buttons, and the other buttons were used for other aspects of the game, such as navigation, launching into hyperwarp, long range scanners and what have you. 

Teleglitch: Die More Edition may try to emulate the look of other 8-bit games, like those to be found on the Atari 5200. It's just too bad the developers didn't take as much care and consideration to the control aspect of the game.

When I started the game, I had some initial difficulty with the tutorial. In fact, I even killed myself accidentally – something that, in most games, is usually something a player needs to actively try to do. One portion of the tutorial involves taking your character to a firing range. In order to fire your gun, you need to right click and hold in order to aim the weapon, and then left click to fire. Sounds simple, right?

Those with a Mac may know where I'm going with this. The basic Mac mouse – or trackpad, if using a laptop (like I do) doesn't have a right mouse button. It's a single button clicker. While it is possible to left-click or simulate a right-click (click the trackpad with two fingers, in contrast to one), you can't do both simultaneously. So I could choose to aim, but I couldn't shoot. And no, there's no way to fire your gun without aiming first. Even though the game is Mac-compatible, this glaring oversight into basic Mac functionality is inexcusable. Fortunately, the game offers controller support!

… only certain controllers, though. My Logitech Precision game controller didn't even register with the game. So much for that idea. The game was pretty much unplayable until I plugged in my third-party mouse. With the mouse and keyboard combination, the game controls became much more manageable. 

Even then, the problems continued. I could aim and fire my weapons now, at least. However, my little pixellated man would only aim at the mouse cursor, no matter which direction I was having him go. This isn't that much of an issue when walking around empty rooms and hallways – if anything, it makes strafing a bit easier. However, this aiming mechanic even applies when swinging your knife at melee range. When creatures are gnawing away at you while moving around your body, it is painful to lash out with your knife, only to start stabbing in the wrong direction because the cursor is on the other side of the screen. 

The premise of the game is a familiar one. You play a research scientist or engineer trapped on a facility where science has gone awry. Monsters roam the area, on the lookout for fresh meat to chow down on. Since you seem to be the only thing left, everything wants to kill you. Your mission is to make it to the teleportation chambers to transmit yourself back to Earth before you get killed.

And you will get killed. A lot. Others have commented on the brutal nature of the game, and they aren't kidding. As soon as you open a door, everything in the area will make a beeline for your position. In fact, I've had it happen where creatures in the next room will open the doors and charge you as well. Trying to play this as a stealth game is impossible. 

Actually, “impossible” is a good way to describe the game. Between the wonky control scheme, the sheer horde of monsters bearing down on you, and the “survival horror” aspects of the game in which you are given very little ammunition and equipment, the game is more frustrating than enjoyable. To top it all off, there are no save points – if you die, you need to start over from the beginning. If you make it to certain levels, you can start your new game from a more advanced point, but making it to those higher levels is questionable. I was killed several times before I finally made it to the teleporter and made it to the second level. Once there, I opened up one box... and was promptly attacked by a creature that came running through the door and pummeled me to pieces. I basically lost interest in trying to complete the game after that.

It's too bad, too, because the game has a lot of promise. There is a way to combine some of the items you find – including empty cans, bombs, and boxes of nails – to make more powerful weapons and armors. Each level is randomly generated, so it can be a new experience every time you play. The music in the game is basically nonexistent, and the sound effects are good. The 8-bit graphics are done well, bringing back the look of the early consoles. They do add something to the game that leads to a disturbing element, though. There are areas of the game that shimmer with multicolored light (not in an 8-bit fashion) that is described in-game as a “bizarre anomaly.” This wouldn't be the first time that a developer has incorporated elements of more modern-day games into a retro-style to emphasize its “strangeness,” but they take it beyond that. Firing certain weapons, including bombs, can cause odd multicolored, graphical glitches as well. The most disturbing use is when you may actually reach a teleporter and use it. The screen wavers with light, and when my wife saw it, she wondered if the shimmering, flashing images may actually cause seizures to those who suffer from epilepsy. That can be a worrying aspect for many video games, but this seems to go past the normal effects you may find in your typical game. 

Morally-speaking, there isn't too much to worry about. There is violence and gunplay, of course. I didn't see it while I tried to play it, but some of the screenshots and trailers do indicate that there can be quite a bit of pixellated blood in the game as well. But the 8-bit graphics certainly don't permit for anything more detailed than that. While there may be some language issues in the game, I was never able to get far enough into the game to discover anything offensive.

All in all, the game is quite a disappointment. Between the ridiculous difficulty and the frustrating control options, there are few redeeming qualities to Teleglitch. The game includes several achievements and Steam trading cards, if played on Steam. But only the most persistent – or masochistic – player will want to go through the hassle of trying to make it to the end.