Christ Centered Gamer

reephn wrote: Sat May 19, 2018 7:01 pm Need a boat? I Noah guy!

Love 1 liners! Need separate thread for long winded jokes.

CARZ

Five hundred bricks in a plane. One falls out. How many are left? How do you put an elephant into a fridge? How do you put a giraffe into a fridge? The Lion is having a birthday party and invites all animals except which one? Sally wishes to cross a river but it is infested with alligators. She crosses it and lives. How? Sally dies anyway. How could she have possibly died?

Why didn't they play cards on the Ark?

Because Noah was standing on the deck.

What did the farmer use to heal the pig from sunburn? Oinkment
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a tv with Minecraft on the other side

mebmatt wrote: Sat Jun 30, 2012 1:15 am Here's a joke my sister came up with (she thinks it's lame) and wanted me to tell it:

What did Harry Potter's godfather say when people thought he was joking about what happened in the Department of Mysteries?



"I'm dead Sirius."

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Ever heard of the dyslexic person who worshiped Dog? Btw I got this joke from my dad Sstavix. I don't find it funny. -_-

ShadowedStarr wrote: Thu Jun 21, 2018 6:02 am Ever heard of the dyslexic person who worshiped Dog? Btw I got this joke from my dad Sstavix. I don't find it funny. -_-

It's a dad joke... You aren't supposed to.

I get my daughter with jokes like that all the time.

ShadowedStarr wrote: Thu Jun 21, 2018 6:02 am Ever heard of the dyslexic person who worshiped Dog? Btw I got this joke from my dad Sstavix. I don't find it funny. -_-

You didn't tell it right.

Have you heard about the dyslexic atheist who didn't believe in dog?

And since this is the joke thread.... My other daughter asked for some jokes, so I made some up that featured some of her favorite characters from TV... My Little Pony. I won't torment you with all of them, just the best (worst?) ones.

Which pony loves to read vampire romance novels?
Which pony loves breakfast cereal? Which pony loves HUMAN FINGERS?

Why can't you ever hear pterodactyls when they're in the bathroom?

Because they have silent "P"

Truth to be told I'm not a big person on jokes but here I go

How do you play hide and seek with an ocelot??

Knock Knock.... Owls.... Yes. Yes they do.

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Q. Why couldn’t Jonah trust the ocean?

A. Because he knew there was something fishy about it.



Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?

A. Noah; he was floating his stock while everyone was in liquidation.

yeah so I am very bad at jokes but, here goes one. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Boom laugh please...

I'm terrible at jokes, so I'll submit a couple funny puns I've seen circulating again...

What is a dentist’s favorite hymn?
Crown Him with Many Crowns

What car make did the Apostles drive?
Honda… because the apostles were all in one Accord.