The mysterious man on a mysterious island of mystery

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The drifted in space, for a week, sending out a distress signal, until finally, a mercenary group of jackals found them and took them hostage...
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baconisgood23
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on an unknown planet in an uncharted part of the universe(there are actually a lot of those). There, Master Chief and the elites were put into a high-security prison, which was reserved for only the most dangerous captives. What would have been iron bars in a normal prison were replaced with laser beams specially designed to immediately vaporize any prisoner that touched them. Master Chief tried to find a way he could shut off the beams. Eventually, he found...
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"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should've been more specific." -Lily Tomlin
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a piece of flint that he flung at a nearby guard. It bounced off his head and ricocheted off a wall then hit the button that released them from their prison.
One of the elites jumped on the guards back and yanked it's spear from it. After knocking it out cold, they decided to...
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Call in support from the base. A few minutes later, Spartan soldiers flooded in and started destroying the jackal soldiers with their high-tech weaponry. Master Chief and the elites got on the helicarrier safely, but they didn't leave fast enough to keep a group of disguised jackal soldiers from sneaking on and...
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"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should've been more specific." -Lily Tomlin
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thankfully shake hands with Chief. For they too, were slaves, on their own planet.

Meanwhile, during all of this. Maria Boomer was having fun. She had just discovered her new powers, she was able to make things explode upon command.
Little did she know that making books explode in the public library of Lisbon, Portugal, was frowned upon.
She ran from the police, out into the streets, where she...
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Got hit by a car which had just reached 88miles per hour and her and the car got zapped into the future where..
"It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so." - Mark Twain
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baconisgood23
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adorable marshmallow people with fezzes ruled the world. Maria asked if she could try on a fez. As soon as she touched it, it exploded(of course). But, since the one she touched was a magic fez, the explosion caused...
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"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should've been more specific." -Lily Tomlin
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Her skin to glow in a greenish hue.

At that moment the pain of being hit by a car came to maria and she fell to the ground in pain...
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cjv
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And at that moment a huge brick-like object that made humming noises flew over and sucked het into its cargo hold.
"It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so." - Mark Twain
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While Maria was writhing on the floor of the flying brick ship, she passed out, and woke up chained to a torture table.

There were two men in the room with her, one wore a lab coat, and the other had an army suit on and was guarding the door.

Before they could do anything Maria made the gun, chains and door explode in an instant. She ran out into the hallway where she...
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found the reactor and blew it up. What she did not know was that the power core was connected to the core of the earth, so the earth exploded along with it. However, since Maria was immortal, she did not die; instead she just floated in space, watching the earth slowly blow up dramatically.

She started to really hate her power.
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"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should've been more specific." -Lily Tomlin
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She floated there, for years on end, in constant blackness, alone and cold...

She watched as countless scavenger ships flew on by her, not even taking care to notice her,
when finally, a ship found her and...
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baconisgood23
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decided to put her out of her misery by chucking her into a black hole.
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"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should've been more specific." -Lily Tomlin
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So they threw her into the black hole wich sucked her into a different dimension that felt strangely familiar she looked up and saw a girl about to be hit by a car going 88 miles per hour....
"It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so." - Mark Twain
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She blew up the car just before it hit her past self.

But little did she know that in blowing up the car, she ended her life, and the life of a different Maria began...
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