I haven't had a chance to...

[ArcticFox]

Yeah, it's rant time.

Ever send someone an E-mail to ask someone a question, or check on something, or some other very simple thing, and you hear nothing back? And then, days or weeks later, you encounter that person and say "Hey, did you get my E-mail?" And they tell you something like this...

"Oh, I just didn't get a chance to check my E-mail."

...

I hate hearing that, because it's a lie. Why not just admit you forgot? Or just didn't get around to it?

"Dude, We've been waiting for your post on the Message Board for your next move in the Warhammer Campaign."
"Oh ok. Yeah I just haven't had the chance to get on and check the board."

I want to just throttle someone for that. Like, do they really expect me to believe that all this time they've been so overwhelmingly busy that they just couldn't find 2 minutes to log in, check messages, and maybe but out a quick reply? Seriously? Because if that's the case they need to either dial things down a bit or hire a personal assistant. I bet their Facebook got updated like clockwork, though.

I get it. I know "I didn't get a chance" is often used as one of those little white lies we toss out there on a daily basis that really doesn't mean what it says, but it isn't socially acceptable not to accept the excuse.

"Did you watch that DVD I loaned you yet?"
"Aw, no man... I haven't had a chance to."

What you WANT to say:
"But I gave it to you in October..."
What social norms make you say:
"Oh, ok. Well you'll like it when you do..."

Don't you hate that? Essentially by telling you that, the person is expecting credit for really, really wanting to do whatever it is, but the pressures of daily life have meant the opportunity to do it has eluded them.

"Hey, did you remember to bring that book with you?"
"No... I didn't get a chance to get it out of the box."

The truth: They forgot.
The fiction you're being sold: "No I didn't bring it because, even though I agreed to get it out of the box in my closet two weeks ago, I literally haven't had 5 minutes to myself to go into that closet, open the box, and get the book out. It's a miracle I've had time to eat any meals at all in the last two weeks. It's just been one thing after another in my hectic, insanely busy, fast paced life!"

Well, I say we start calling people out on it! I say we abandon a social norm that says people can blow you off and not be called out on it!

"Hey, where's that twenty you promised me?"
"Oh jeez dude I'm sorry... I didn't get a chance to stop by the ATM this week to get it for you."
"Oh yeah? All this week you didn't pass one single bank, convenience store or gas station where you could have gone to the ATM to get the money for me?"
"Well... I just didn't want to pay the ATM fee so I have to go to my own bank."
"Yeah? Your bank 100 miles away?"
"Huh?"
"Is your bank 100 miles away?"
"No, why?"
"Then you could have made an effort to swing by your bank to get that twenty bucks at some point this week."
"Like I said, I just didn't have a chance to..."
"BULL. You mean to tell me you were running late to work every single day this week, and couldn't detour to the bank on the way in? What about on the way hom? Was it imperative that you race straight home every single night for the last 5 days and so you couldn't bother to go get the money you PROMISED me?"
"I just..."

Yeah.

/rant

[fathom123]

Sweet rant.

I feel convicted because I have a tendency to be one of those people. With the upcoming PBP game, I will do my best to not be that dude.

Thank you Arctic, you make me want to be a better man.

[ArcticFox]

Then my work here is done.

I just needed to get all that out. I'm GM'ing a Warhammer campaign and trying to get everyone to update their actions or keep up with what' shappening is like herding cats. I created a freaking simple, 1 page campaign summary page on my gaming club website so you could, at a glance, learn all yuo needed about the current goings on.

And even so...

"Dude, you know you have an extra 100 points to add to that army since you had a successful mining result, right?'
"Oh no I had no idea! That's awesome!"
"It was on the summary page..."
"Oh yeah I haven't had a chance to look at the website this week..."



And that wouldn't be a big deal except that stuff like that causes the whole campaign to get slowed down, and all the other players have to sit around and wait because the slackers have to be prodded and coddled. I'm finding myself sending out E-mails now to people who habitually fail to keep up because if I don't I guarantee they'll never do their actions and the campaign will fade away. I'm seriously contemplating moving on without them.

[Chozon1]

What bothers me is the 'Put if off as your problem I did nothing' garglemesh. Like 'well, I'm sorry you got your feelings hurt' as a lame apology. That's not apologizing, it's you being stupid. Or "I'm sorry you felt that way" or "I'm sorry you thought that was going on".

Because then, it's like...I was just imagining things, and if I'd just get over it, everything would've been fine.

IE:

Someone deliberately calls me an idiot. I accept it, move on. Later they're like "Well, I don't even know why you're angry at me" and I'm like "Um...you called me an idiot earlier". And then they're like "No I didn't." And I'm like "Yeah....yeah you did. It hurt mah feelings" and they're like "Well, I'm sorry you felt that way".

...RAGE.

[ArcticFox]

Yeah it's a way of taking credit for an apology without ACTUALLY apologizing.

I posted a rant about that last year...

Kinda like "I'm sorry if calling you an idiot hurt your feelings." Well, you know it hurt my feelings so just say you're sorry!

[CountKrazy]

I'm just thanking God you didn't say "ATM machine."

I would've been deeply distraught if you had said that. @__@

[fathom123]

ANGRY WORDS!!!

[Chozon1]

I'm just thanking God you didn't say "ATM machine."

I would've been deeply distraught if you had said that. @__@

What about 'EMP pulse'? Or 'CD disc'?

[ArchAngel]

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