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Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sat Nov 03, 2018 6:13 pm
by Lahd
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Student: "Meat!"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"
Student: "Bacon!"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
Student: "Homework!"

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2018 4:28 am
by Potatosaur
Why did the chicken cross the road?


To get to the other side!

Best joke of all time

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2018 1:20 am
by kittycathead
What did the sword tell the man?
Spoiler:
"Lookin' sharp!"

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2018 4:02 am
by vandalsblj
What do you call a Nun wondering around the Neighborhood?
Spoiler:
A Roaming Catholic

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Tue Nov 13, 2018 1:39 am
by setfree
I had to look one up, but this one made me smile:

Q: What do computers eat for a snack?
A: Microchips!

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2018 8:27 pm
by MattNickPooz
How 'bout a series of "Elephant Jokes"?

Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
A: With a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a white elephant?
A: Hold his nose until he turns blue, then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.

Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?
A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It was glued to the first one.
Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It thought it was a game.
Q: And why did the tree fall down?
A: It thought it was an elephant.

Q: Why do elephants wear sandals?
A: So that they don't sink in the sand.
Q: Why do ostriches stick their head in the ground?
A: To look for the elephants who forgot to wear their sandals.

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Thu Nov 22, 2018 7:14 pm
by matthew_com
Q. What do pigs put on their cuts?
A. Oinkment!

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sat Nov 24, 2018 6:35 pm
by DizzeyMCdonald
What did the janitor yell when he was coming out the closet to scare someone? Supplies!!
Why didnt they play cards on the ark? Becuase Noah was standing on the deck!

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2018 7:25 am
by BelieverInGod88
What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wal? “Dam!”

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2019 3:22 am
by Pandi_Tech
"Why are there not any boomerangs at the landfill?"

"I don't know, why?"

"Because every time you throw one into the trash, it just flies back out!"

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 2:50 am
by WorthyGamer
Biology joke, ready?


"Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled in thirty different countries and learned to speak six languages? He was a man of many cultures"


Haha! Get it? No? Here.


"When you breathe, you inspire, and when you do not breathe, you expire."


Anyways, thought those were hilarious! Hope I made you laugh too!

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:00 pm
by dragondestroyer1
Mother: eat your carrots they are good for you

Kid: then why do I get sick every time I look at them

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 2:10 am
by PigLover64
I am terrible at jokes so I always just reference memes. Just go watch the latest Meme Review and subscribe to Pewdiepie for some quality memes. "Christian Channel" guys.

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sat Apr 20, 2019 4:24 am
by NitroBeast70
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?


Breathe, stupid!

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Fri Apr 26, 2019 9:37 pm
by Emotionartist
Q: A pastor, a priest, and a pope walk into a bar. They all say ouch. Why?

A: Well, they walked into a iron bar. That would hurt.