Is there something wrong with me?!?!?!

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kittycathead
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Is there something wrong with me?!?!?!

Postby kittycathead » Sun Mar 11, 2018 12:25 am

Today is the last day before my church's 21 day fast.

You might be thinking that I need strength to finish it, but that's not what I'm here for.

I'm almost overweight, and my family stresses that on me. However, what they don't know is that whenever they tell me to watch what I eat, my brain interprets that as 'I'm getting fat, I should stop eating'. I've been greatly considering a full fast so I can lose some weight. I also have depression so said fast might continue after Easter if I end up going the full fast route (it's also very easy to trigger suicidal thoughts). (This is my first time fasting.)

I was also born with a very mild case of autism (which my family wants me to grow out of, and I don't want to grow out of it), and I feel like nobody understands me since I'm basically standing at the line between normal and autistic.

I feel like there's something wrong with me, help!!!

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J.K. Riki
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Re: Is there something wrong with me?!?!?!

Postby J.K. Riki » Sun Mar 11, 2018 1:19 am

First, there's something wrong with all of us. So don't feel like you're alone there. We're here on this planet to deal with the stuff wrong with us. It's part of the entire point of this life. It's far better to know it and deal with it rather than (as many do) ignore it and pretend everything is perfect all the time. If we are not yet perfect like Christ is perfect (and we probably aren't yet) then there is indeed still something wrong with us. God is patient to help us work on those bits until we have a heart that shines like the sun. It'll come one day. In the meantime we can know yeah, there are things still to work on.

Second, by all means do what you need to in order to live a healthy lifestyle of your choosing, but be VERY cautious of using a spiritual fast for any purpose other than what spiritual fasts are FOR. They are not about weight loss. They should never be about weight loss. Fasts exist for a very, very, very specific reason, and that reason is spiritual not physical. If you're contemplating doing a fast for any reason that isn't God related, it is not going to end well, because that was never what it was intended for. (If you want to do a non-spiritual fast specifically for health reasons, that's different. They just shouldn't be combined.)

As far as "understanding" goes, there may indeed never be another person on this earth who truly understands you. Or me. Or any of us. Thankfully God does. He understands us better than we understand ourselves. Fellowship (human fellowship) allows us to come together and unify on a number of things that we all have in common. There will always be some things we don't have in common, though. It's what makes us us. We aren't robots. The beautiful news is that even in our unique state, we have a Savior who totally gets us, 100%. And loves that unique us, too.

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Re: Is there something wrong with me?!?!?!

Postby ccgr » Sun Mar 11, 2018 4:23 am

We love you for who you are hun. J. K is right about the purpose of fasting. Besides a full fast is never good and your body will hold onto fat instead of burning it if you deprive yourself of needed nutrients. We are not asking you to fast, that's between you and God. fasting doesn't have to be food, it can be music, games, anything that will allow you to focus on God instead during that time.

Regarding the autism, you have a VERY mild case and don't let that be an excuse to hold yourself back. Yes it's part of you, but there's more to you than that. You're a bright kid and have a lot of talent. I look forward to seeing what you can do with your creativity.

Let's talk in person okay?

Love you.

mom


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