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Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Tue Jul 30, 2019 9:39 pm
by MyNinjaPenguin
Famous old proverb:

He who runs in front of a car gets tired, he who runs behind a car gets exhausted.

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Fri Aug 02, 2019 3:11 pm
by sunsplace
This is a short one, i had to look it up, I'm not really from the jokes :)

Did you hear the story about the claustrophobic astronaut?


.....




He just needed some space. :P

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Tue Aug 06, 2019 7:23 pm
by CuteRainbowElsa
What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?







…..




A can’t opener!

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Tue Aug 27, 2019 10:12 am
by ThoseFromHeaven
Seeing as I'm a dad, perfect time for a dad joke:

I can always tell, just by looking, when someone is lying.

I can also tell when they're standing!

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Wed Sep 04, 2019 10:27 pm
by kittycathead
A communist joke isn't funny unless everyone gets it.

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sat Oct 19, 2019 8:38 pm
by kat2288
My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Mon Nov 18, 2019 12:13 am
by kittycathead
I got fired from the bank today, because an old lady asked to check my balance and I pushed her over

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Tue Dec 03, 2019 4:29 pm
by lukider
I was at my new house with my friend and he asked "What's up stairs?"
and i responded "Stairs don't talk"

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Wed Dec 04, 2019 5:03 am
by alexnsteve
why did the chicken cross the road? To get on GOD'S side, BOOYA!

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 6:43 am
by TigerElla7
I don't know many jokes but I love puns. The books of the Land of Xanth by Piers Anthony has lots of puns in there, some not too clean. It has one about a plaque with felines posterior on it. and a Tree with toilet paper on it called a toiletry and a lake ogrechobee like lake Okeechobee in Florida but of course its surrounded by ogres. anyway I will retreat to the corner before I start getting rocks thrown at me for my bad puns.

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 10:14 pm
by somebodysmom
My daughter's favorite joke:

What do you call it when Batman skips church?

Christian Bale/bail...

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Mon Dec 09, 2019 7:37 pm
by sarna
Polish politics
sadly this is one big joke

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Wed Dec 25, 2019 12:44 am
by CommunistToad
No. (Sorry)

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2020 11:00 pm
by pjakeh
Here's my joke...

The 2019 New England Patriot's playoff run defense...

Wrecked...

Re: The Joke Thread

Posted: Mon Mar 16, 2020 4:33 pm
by JCR1010
Knock Knock
Who's there
Noah
Noah who
Know a place for dinner.