Please pray for my wife and myself...

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BlockHeadLewie
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Greetings,

(First a short back story):

I was once living on the streets, hitch hiking around the country trying to grow a bit and enjoy life some. I was also in search of something to bring back to the worship group I was involved in before I started my trek: I was a Satan worshiper. Within a month of starting out on this adventure I met Jesus in the desert town of Kingman, Arizona. I found myself in Florida and struggling to wish to continue life because I was tired of everything being against me. I didn't know it at the time but Satan wasn't happy I switched sides. I was apparently valuable to God's Plan.

I have been under The Blood of Jesus for about a year at this time, still in Spiritual diapers so to speak, and just accepting my life as failure. I ran into Joanne when her roommate saw me and knew my plans of suicide, so offered me a hot meal and shower in order to encourage me to try life some more. Joanne's life and personality caught me off guard and I fell in love and lost my desire to kill myself. (God Intervenes!)

Joanne was in fact THE BEST thing God gave to me, save for Jesus Christ. I learned how society functions a bit better, grew in wisdom with dealing with people and felt love from another person for the first time since I ran off to hitch hike.

(Back to the present):

For about 10 years now my wife has been suffering with mild dementia and it seems to be getting worse. It may be the start of Alzheimer's or some other form that is similar to it. She has lost much of her memory, quite a bit of self confidence and is (almost) running her life in fear. Much of this fear comes from past abuse as well as lack of proper support from family, so directly involves me as "the potential abuser". Her defenses and lack of direct involvement with me any more are causes for great cause for alarm.

I have FULL faith in God's Will, God's Word and God's Way so honestly have no serious worries. However I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried at all. If this were the case I wouldn't make this post. I've tried getting help from people, even my own church, but it seems (with the aid of Satan's lies) I am alone in this quest. I know I am not for I know a few at my church are in fact praying. I also know this post won't be ignored for I believe what I've seen within this community is in fact within The Plan of God and God's People are here. Period.

My prayer request is this: Please pray for Joanne's health all across the board (mental, physical, emotional, etc) as well as for myself to remain strong and confident in my belief that this is merely temporary, some form of education for us both.

I have been with my wife (Joanne) for almost 32 years now. She was my first love after I loved Jesus for loving me.

Thank you, and God Bless!

Lewie
If God is my Pilot and fully in control of the flight, I guess that makes me a Steward on the plane. How may I serve you?
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ccgr
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Thanks for sharing your story and I will definitely keep your wife and you in my prayers. Please keep us posted.
WisteriaWillows
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Just found this and praying for your wife's health now.
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lokik21
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Ill pray for your wife as well as you.
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BlockHeadLewie
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Thank you for your prayers. One thing we can always count on is God's people are never forsaken.
Things are basically in a steady phase. Steady increase in effort on her part, but also steady increase in confusion as well. There is also a steady Flow of The Work of God, too. (Means it is well with my soul knowing others pray with me on this matter!)
I myself am not necessarily losing touch with reality, per say, but have lost track of time a lot due to interrupted sleep patterns, occasional extended hospital visits or trying to maintain lifestyle stability.
Once again, thank you.
Peace!
8)
If God is my Pilot and fully in control of the flight, I guess that makes me a Steward on the plane. How may I serve you?
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BlockHeadLewie
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Well the communication factor is starting to become less of a problem: Wife and I are having good, normal conversations more now. No matter what happens in life, I Love God's Hand!
Having said that, Joanne rolled out of bed and hurt her knee on the floor and her head on a table near the headboard. It's not serious, but serious enough she's headed to the hospital.
Satan just won't leave us alone!
I'm expecting a ride to pick me up any moment now to head that way.
Please continue to pray for us?
Thank you.
:shock:
If God is my Pilot and fully in control of the flight, I guess that makes me a Steward on the plane. How may I serve you?
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ccgr
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Yikes, praying please keep us posted!
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BlockHeadLewie
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Felt led to give an update. It does seem rather helpful to get things out in the open, for me at least. Knowing I'm not (really) alone helps even more. I am thankful to you all!
Joanne isn't making much progress with her dementia. Having said that, she don't seem to be getting worse either. She still forgets things easy, even in mid conversation, she still gets confused over some things which never bothered her before and the fear is still present. She is also still taking money for her cigarettes and other useless things. Plus she is still having fall issues sometimes and won't use her knee brace.
This fear is my main concern because it's directed at me mainly. Her past has many uncomfortable parts to it which contributes greatly. What confuses (and yes, scares) me the most is that, so far, ANYONE that I ask "So do you and Joanne talk?" and they usually respond along the lines of "Well she gets lost a little sometimes and does forget, but we have good conversations."
I always have to watch what I say, when I say it, why I'm saying it and how I say it. She don't seem to understand facial expressions or body language as part of the conversation. If we're watching the same TV show and someone says something on the show, I might comment on it and suddenly she thinks I'm talking to her and not understanding it's at the TV. Heck I even have physical problems with my back and if I move wrong it hurts or just gets really tight and I sigh over it, she immediately wonders what she did wrong!
I am in this race for the finish, meaning I will not give up. I've already passed ALL of this marriage unto The Lord, and I am thankful He brought me here to Prism. I am also thankful Prism has brought me unto family again.
Thank you.
8)
If God is my Pilot and fully in control of the flight, I guess that makes me a Steward on the plane. How may I serve you?
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ccgr
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keeping your family in my prayers. Thanks for the update.
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lokik21
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Continuing to pray for you, your wife, family and friends in this hard time.
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BlockHeadLewie
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We are waiting right now for a case manager to come talk to us about assisted living facilities, which is why I'll be missing out on tonight's events. (She's actually late...)
It's never been an option until she started doing risky things, like going for walks without her walker for example.
I'm not necessarily scared, but I'm not too far from it. If I didn't know about God, I'd be terrified.
And once again thank you all for the prayers. It's one of several things we have on our side, and it's the most important one!
Peace!
8)
If God is my Pilot and fully in control of the flight, I guess that makes me a Steward on the plane. How may I serve you?
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lokik21
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I'll continue to pray for you. Good luck.
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ccgr
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praying for strength and wisdom
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BlockHeadLewie
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Well we have reached a point of (almost) total ruin. Our lights are off now, got shut off Friday and I've been working on getting the funds to have them turned back on.
I say 'almost' because I know somehow God is STILL in control, even if it's not obvious.
Thank you for being available and thank you for being my family!
If God is my Pilot and fully in control of the flight, I guess that makes me a Steward on the plane. How may I serve you?
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ccgr
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oh no! Praying for you guys continually!
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