Praying for you! I've been there several times, so if you need to vent at all, feel free to message me! Just remember that you're not alone in it all. King David suffered from very deep depression, and he speaks about it many times in the Psalms that he wrote. I read them over and over whenever I am depressed, particularly Psalm 143 (NLT).
I know I'm new here and that I don't know you, but I know that God will bring you out of this. I can say that from experience, as well as many others. It will get better. I am praying for you to find a wonderful therapist as well- someone you will feel comfortable talking to. Having someone listen is one of the best things when you're going through this.